I once saw a man get gobbled up by his living room light. I did! Honest! I know the look you’re giving me right now. It’s the same look my parents gave me. The police too. And my neighbours, passing strangers on the street, the local paper, the national paper and just about every late night talk show going! But I know what I saw and you can’t change that. I was passing by a terrace one afternoon, it was just getting dark. I didn’t mean to be nosey at first, it just sorta happens as I stroll along. I get interested in other people’s lives and get an itch to know more! That’s not the point anyway. The point is, I was passing by this man’s house just at the same time he was turning on his living room light for the evening. I looked away for a second just as his hand clicked the switch and when I looked back? He was gone! Just like that! The light had turned itself off too! Most likely full after its meal….That’s what I figured.
So now , I live in constant fear of being eaten by anything with even the smallest blinking light! Kettles, washing machine displays, tumble dryers and toasters…all are out to get me! I’m convinced!